As parents of children with autism we have all felt overwhelmed at one point or another. Along with being overwhelmed is the need to make choices about our children. When faced with my child’s diagnosis, I remember the doctor asking me if I would be quitting work and staying home with my daughter, which for me was not an option. All the choices we have to make; stay at home or work, change of diet, medicate or not medicate, use a developmental pediatrician or a neurologist, put the child in a special school or special education, along with the challenge of getting help and information concerning those choices we need to make.

So let’s look at some of these choices, starting with a parent being at home. This is better for any child with or without autism but is it right for the family? I have read of documented cases where having a parent at home means the child does much better because she is getting that reinforcement of things learned in school and the added extra help with reading, writing, and basic developmental milestones. But does that mean the child won’t develop if one or both parents work? I would like to think that each child will succeed according to his or her own gifts, and each child has their own gifts. Even with working outside the home I have seen an improvement in my daughter and a need to focus on other areas at home. I keep these other areas in the forefront and work on them as much as possible. One thing for sure is that being at home makes it much easier to manage a restrictive diet.

So let’s talk about the casein and gluten-free diet. As a working mom it serves as a source of great frustration. However, I listen to parents that have tried the diet and rave about it. My experience with the gluten-free diet started with my daughter getting sick every three to five days. After I removed wheat from her diet her illness ceased. On occasion she still gets sick and I know right away she’s eating too much wheat. One thing I did notice was after she has purged is that her speech improves. Coincidence, maybe? Maybe not? Removing casein from her diet did nothing. But for other children it made a world of difference. So I try to limit her wheat and keep her on fresh fruits and vegetables and lean meats. This has kept her stomach trouble to a minimum and that is one less medication she has to take.

So what about medications. A common theme in children with autism seems to be some type of gastrointestinal trouble, hyperactivity, and bi-polar disorder. Some doctors prefer ADHD meds for the hyperactivity. For my daughter these just made her mean and nasty. It turns out that she is bi-polar. Now that she is on the proper medication she’s doing fine. But why the gastro-intestinal trouble? Does your child need Prevacid or Prilosec for acid reflux, or just a change in diet? Some children in the population are taking multiple drugs to control impulses, behaviors and other medical conditions. Whatever the case is for your child, research and open discussions with your child’s doctors, can help.

So what about the choice of doctor? I had Blue Cross & Blue Shield tell me that my child with autism doesn’t require an alternative doctor and that a pediatrician could handle her case just fine. I responded that I would get back to them with my attorney. Is a developmental pediatrician the best choice to help and treat a child with autism? Some may prefer a neurologist, especially when it’s time to start medication. Neurologists for the most part are better versed on medications and their interactions than a developmental pediatrician may be. However, depending on your child’s needs, a developmental pediatrician may be the answer to a number of questions. I’m using a developmental pediatrician and things are working out just fine.

One thing for sure, dealing with a child with autism can be overwhelming. Support groups and interaction can help. Being faced with so many choices can also be overwhelming. Take them one at a time and remember whatever the choice you make regarding, diet, medication, doctors, or educational support, do what’s best for your child, yourself and your family.

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